8/10/04
Love is never having to say you're sorry.
And no one knows this better than our president. So the next time you
hear George Walker Bush say that he has no regrets about sending hundreds of
Americans and thousands of Iraqi to a horrible and senseless death, realize
that what he is actually saying is "I love you."
Talked to Donnie Rumsfeld last night. (I call him Donnie or "Yam Yam"
or sometimes by his collage nickname "Oh dark and powerful one who is the
light").
After catching up, he informed me that I could not write "I just raped the president" in my blog or he would be forced to throw me into a Jordanian prison and stick rolled up pages of the Koran up my ass for reasons of national security. I had to explain that I was referring to
the president of the NAACP.
"Oh that's OK then", he said. "I've been wanting to rape him for years myself."
And we had a big laugh over that. So I asked him, since we were on the subject, if he was personally offended by my previous rape blog. He said, you will be pleased to know, that, the president rape thing aside, he knew exactly "where I was coming from"
because his spirit guide had told him that he had been raped in a past life
and he was still "working through it" on this cosmic plain. Mostly by blowing up small children with smart bombs as part of his administration's No Child Left Behind program (also known as OPERATION PEACE KILL).
I told him I'm glad that he's doing all the necessary inner work on his chi but I
really had to go. It was late and it was kind of hard to hear him through all his gurgling sobs. I forgot to ask if he ordered the probes at Abu Ghraib and if he were an alien. Well, next time.Did anyone go to Boston to protest in the freedom cages?
I wanted to go and stand in a cage so maybe a really nice democrat would look though the
metal links and say, ever so gently, "Hi bright eyes". Then maybe they would all
realize that they evolved from humans.